Are You For Real

June 23, 2009 by admncc

My four-year-old answered the phone last night and said, “Daddy, it’s for you.”  Below is the gist of my five-minute conversation with the caller:

Solicitor:  Is this Mr. Zkghwkfhalfie (they slaughter my last name)?

Me:  Yes.

Solicitor:  I’m calling because you entered a contest to win either a new car or $25,000 (keep in mind that I don’t remember entering the contest – so either one of my buddies entered me or it’s a scam).

Me:  Uh-huh.

Solicitor:  Congratulations, you’re a semi-finalist.

Me:  Uh-huh.

Solicitor:  All we need to do is verify some information.  Is your address still _____?  And are you still married?

Me:  Yes and yes.

Solicitor:  OK, well, all we need to do is get you scheduled for your tour.

Me:  Tour?

Solicitor:  Yes, in order to get your key (that may open the doors to your new car), you and your wife must take a tour of the _____ resort.

Me:  I’ve heard of it, but that’s about two hours from my house.

Solicitor:  Also, if you come in for the tour, you are guaranteed to receive two of the following five items: TV, camcorder, digital camera, $500 or a Vegas/Florida vacation.  I repeat; you will get two of those five items just for showing up and taking the tour.

Me:  Sounds too good to be true (inner voice prompts me to hang-up).  Listen, I’m busy and you’ll have to call me back.

After I hung up, I told my wife about the free gifts and that I should consider pushing them on their promotion.  Meaning – I have a phone recording device, so when they call back, I’m going to record it and post it on here.  And I might just go for the tour and see what happens…

My wife said, “If it’s too good to be true, it probably is.”  I think she’s right.  What do you think?

All Posts / Business / Entertainment / Family/Lifestyle Fake Contests / Phone Solicitations / Phone Solicitors / Scams / Solicitations / Solicitors /


  1. Hal says:

    Any time a sales person says both you and your spouse need to be present, you know they’re going to hammer you on the spot for a cell. It takes away your “I need to ask my wife” response.

    I say record it and throw it in their face at the tour. Also sounds like one of those contests that you see in the middle of the mall.

  2. Dan says:

    I always say I “hate” stuff on here. But I really hate phone solicitations. Anymore, I won’t answer the phone unless I recognize the number and know who it is. The “Do Not Call” registries don’t work.

    Hal, I’m sorry to sound like Zig, but I think you meant “sell” and not “cell” above.

  3. You can expect that the “two of the five” prizes will be low quality crap. It’s high pressure sales and you won’t win the car. Unless you are really interested in researching this or are a gluten for punishment, skip it

  4. c.princess says:

    If they’re insisting you take a tour of the resort it sounds like they may try to sell you a time share.

  5. Deb says:

    I think you should go. Wanna borrow my BB gun?

  6. ugh, was he indian?

  7. p.s. i can make fun of indians cus i dated one. and he was a heroin addict and ruined my life. that makes it okay, right?

  8. Marissa says:

    Yeah, you’ll definitely get the hard-sell on a time share. My sister and her husband went to one of those “presentations”. They actually did get a free 3-night Vegas trip at one of the better hotels.

    But they said the high-pressure tactics of the salespeople went beyond obnoxious, especially when my sister wouldn’t cave in to a sale. The sales guy was fully pissed off, as if HIS time was wasted.

  9. MikeE says:

    went on one of those “tours” to get my free crap. Wasted a day, though it was fun watching thier faces get red when I turned it into a game and only answered “no” (even to non yes/no questions)

  10. Sugar says:

    A friend of mine wanted to “upgrade” their hotel room on their honeymoon. They were told all they had to do was attend a breakfast presentation. What they failed to mention was that the breakfast presentation turned into a lunch presentation which turned into a dinner one as well. Besides wasting their day on their honeymoon, they were bombarded with phone calls from the company giving the presentation on the items that were presented. They never did receive the hotel “upgrade” either.

  11. The Constant Complainer says:

    Blunt Delivery, if he ruined your life, yes, you can and should trash him on here!

  12. Tristan says:

    There is no such thing as a free lunch.

  13. Anne says:

    Hmmm asks if your address is correct, then wants you to leave your home? I’m always weary of “free” solicitations.

  14. Extreme John says:

    I hate anyone calling me to sell me anything it’s beyond frustrating and being a business owner we have people walk in the front door everyday selling some kind of something.

    I’m biased and automatically hated everything about this as soon as I saw the word solicitor, I wouldn’t waste my time not to mention it might land me in jail.

  15. Sounds like something that involves money in the end…

  16. Zig says:

    Blunt Delivery, how did he “ruin your life?” And why does it make it ok for you to lable all Indians, I assume you mean East Indians, as bad? Isn’t this a matter of free will? Didn’t you choose to date this heroin addict? Wouldn’t it be better to say that YOU ruined your life because of him? Regardless, please share. It would make a good post! We…err…I would like to help you get over this guy… I have a brother who is currently single and looking.

    To the poster: My mother and father go to Florida for a week multiple times a year. They stay in a condo, off the beach, in Weston Florida. They pay a nominal fee and the only thing is they are asked to sit through an 2 hour sales pitch and take a dinner cruise. They can either go to the pitch or just decline. Well, they both love it and at the end of the week they tell their hosts, “No thanks. We’re not interested. We don’t want to buy a condo in Florida.” Sounds like what you were offered was an opportunity to go to their sales pitch!

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