Moron of the Week Award #5

June 3, 2009 by admncc

Wow, for starters, I just wanted to say that I couldn’t believe how yesterday’s post took off like it did.  I had discussed the topic with several people prior to posting it and I knew opinions were going to be strong on both sides.  But it even exceeded my expectations.  It was fun to see so many readers joining in the discussion.

With that being said (and not everyone may agree with this); based on many of yesterday’s comments, I think it’s safe to say that the majority think we should nominate LeBron James for our “Moron of the Week Award.”

That’s right; the MOTWA is back.  Here are this week’s nominations:

  • LeBron James.  Cleveland Cavaliers star who walked off the court after a loss to Orlando, refused to shake hands after the game and refused to participate in the post-game press conference.
  • Turtle Lover Lady.  The Pennsylvania woman who is searching for her runaway pet – a 52 pound, 2-foot-long African sulcata tortoise.
  • Water Meter Biller.  A Florida couple was accidentally billed $21,000 on their monthly water bill.  The error was apparently caused by a faulty water meter.  I’m wondering who in their public utilities office reviews the list of accounts before the bills actually go out.
  • John and Kate Gosselin.  Stars of the show “John & Kate Plus 8” on TLC.  Both have reportedly cheated on each other and have elected fame and fortune over family.  To make matters worse, Pennsylvania’s Labor Department is now reportedly looking into whether or not the TV show complies with child labor laws.  Does anyone else think their “15 minutes” is up?
  • Hyena Guy.  The man who called the Department of Natural Resources to report that he heard a hyena in his backyard – only to later find out that it was actually his wife talking to his neighbor.

BTW, to celebrate the one-year anniversary of The Constant Complainer, there will be a series of fun posts going up over the next few days.  During that time we’ll be giving away American Express gift cards and t-shirts to readers who leave comments…

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  1. Sugar says:

    CC, where do you find these morons? This is too funny! I would have to go with the Turtle Lady Lover. How the hell can you lose a turtle?

  2. KD says:

    I just read the hyena story. That’s hilarious and gets my vote.

  3. Mike says:

    Wow I’m at a loss on this one. I want to pick the Hyena Guy, but his wife could just be that horrendous. So I’ll go with the turtle lady. Like Sugar said, how the hell could she lose a turtle?

  4. NeoConDon says:

    Wow…this is a list of pure morons. Each has won in their own way. My wife and I have watched John and Kate on occasion, and I can tell you that I feel bad for those children because of the added stress they’re being exposed to…they get my vote.

  5. Turtles and hyenas; makes my encounters with wildlife and weird neighbors seem kind of lame.

  6. c.princess says:

    The Hyena Guy is in first place. Second, the turtle lover.

  7. c.princess says:

    I changed my mind. The Hyena guy remains still in first place but in second place, the Water Meter Biller.

  8. Timmy says:

    My vote is for John and Kate. Well, mostly Kate. Even Octomom took a shot at her this week and you know its bad when your getting crap from Octomom

  9. Dan says:

    Timmy, you are right. When Octomom starts making fun of you, you’ve hit the end of the line. I vote for hyena guy.

  10. William Gatherer says:

    I would have to say that the MOTW would have to go to the turtle lady… Look out turtle head coming through. Labron got his day in the spot light.

    I would just like to see him post here to try to defend why he did what he did, and how he can find a “professional” attitude by acting so “childish”.

  11. Tristan says:

    The hyena story is funny, but sounds like complete fiction to me. Lebron just plain screwed up.

    The real morons here are the fertility-pill-popping adulterers who sold out their children rather than having to work for a living. Imagine the embarrassment when those kids grow up and look back at their morally-empty parents, not to mention for the rest of their lives they will be defined by this shining example of idiocy. Thanks, mom and dad, for exploiting your children to make a few bucks. See how much that million dollar home is worth in a few months.

  12. hmmm… well my heart wants to say hyena guy… but can i nominate spencer and heidi pratt instead?

    cus, really?

  13. Thank you Tristan, I agree completely. I feel really bad for those children.

  14. PS Blunt, Heidi and Spencer being morons of the week is a major understatement – they are life morons. God, I wish I could have seen Spencer cry the tears that he cried “I didn’t know we were REALLY going to be out in the rain forest, I thought we were going to be staying in a 5 star hotel”. Janice Dickinson can deal with it, but Spencer Pratt and Heidi Montag can’t? Funny!

  15. dani says:

    lmao I love them all !!!

  16. Jon and Kate have a special ring of hell devoted just to them.

    The water meter issue happens more often than you think, but that’s a little ridiculous.

  17. I’m really torn between Jon and Kate and the hyena man. That’s just hilarious. I wonder if my husband thinks I’m a laughing hyena when entertaining my friends….hmmmm

    But I’m gonna vote for Jon and Kate. Not only are they morons but they are complete douchebags too.

    OOOOhhh Blunt I’d totally vote for Heidi and Spencer. They quit the show, they went back, they quit, they went back, they asked people to go to the airport in disguise….Seriously retarded people but they aren’t Morons of the Week they are Morons of the Century. Maybe in the future CC will start that award!?

  18. thinkinfyou says:

    I’m going with Lebron. Somebody needs to teach that boy some manners. Go Orlando!!

  19. Flanagan says:

    Don you would pick Jon and Kate. The only reason you picked them was because of one fateful night. Oh yes I remember that night that you were so upset about losing your hermit crab that you drank a case of Schlitz, filled your garage with water in the hopes that “Hermie” your hermit crab would come to swim and then called the police because you thought a cat was stuck on your roof because you kept hearing meow. Only to find out once the police arrived that it was your wife saying owwww because the crab had bit her foot, and you refused to thank the cops for doing their jobs. Then when the water bill came you blamed it on a faulty water meter. It was like process of elimination for you.

  20. Too bad Hyena guy’s wife doesn’t cheat on him with the water meter biller man…..

  21. Marissa says:

    LOL @ The Stabbing Pen. The Hyena Guy gets my vote. Admittedly, I’ve laughed like a hyena during a drunk moment or two (several). But good thing my husband’s not such a dumbass as to call the Fish and Game Dept.

  22. NeoConDon says:

    You’re a liar Flanagan…it wasn’t schlitz…it was Little Kings!

  23. Valley Girl says:

    Heard LeBron has to pay $25k!

  24. Sugar says:

    Flanagan- that is hilarious!

  25. The Constant Complainer says:

    Valley Girl, thanks for visiting! And you’re right. LeBron was fined $25K.

    Here’s what was reported on

    “Stern said Thursday night that he spoke with the Cavaliers star on Wednesday, a day after James had surgery to remove a benign growth near his jaw, and that James admitted he was wrong to not congratulate Orlando’s players and coaches after the loss.

    “He asked that I express to the media, the Magic and the fans his apology, and particularly the young fans, because he knows he has a responsibility to all of our fans, and that sportsmanship is appropriate whether you win or whether you lose,” Stern said near the start of his annual NBA finals press conference.”

  26. KD says:

    Octomom is really slamming John & Kate to the press. This is getting good. Maybe Octomom will make fun of LeBron next.

  27. Tristan says:

    $25,000! So that’s like a ~$50 fine for the rest of us… (i.e. having your car towed)

  28. Extreme John says:

    Haha one of my favorite times of the week.

    Let’s see here..
    Lebron – All though a moronic move there’s worse
    Turtle Lady – Undoubtedly a moron of sorts
    Jon & Kate – Both morons, kind of expected this to go this way so Im not shocked
    Hyena Guy – He gets it twice, he’s a moron for marrying someone if they sound anything like a Hyena and he’s certainly a moron for calling the police to report it.

    Hyena Guy is my choice for MOTW

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