Sir, can I ask you a question?
March 25, 2009 by admncc
There are several malls near our house. My wife says that’s a good thing. I’m kind of impartial about it. But what I will tell you is this – I like going to the newly designed shopping centers that have all the mall stores, but are outdoors. Obviously they are more fun in the summer than winter, but I still like them better than the old-school dying breed indoor malls.
The indoor malls around us are going downhill. Most have trimmed their hours down, have lost the anchor chain stores and as you walk through; you can’t help but notice the empty store spaces.
But the one thing that really ticks me off is the poor store choices these malls choose to go with. They could learn something from the outdoor malls of the future. No pet stores, no cell phone and fingernail booths and no t-shirt airbrushing stores. Need I go on?
Seriously, I can’t go to my local mall and walk through it without having someone from a cell phone booth jump in front of me and ask who my carrier is. I even saw one of their workers purposefully push a pile of flyers off their counter, just so they could solicit the poor sap that stopped to help pick the flyers up. This, of course, when they aren’t busy gawking at the women who walk by. Listen cell phone boy. I don’t need you yelling across the aisle to ask me who my carrier is. If I have a question, need phone equipment or would like to discuss service options, I will stop by. And did you ever notice that there are typically six different booths like this in every mall.
Now let’s talk about the fingernail groomers. They are popping up more and more at these indoor malls. You walk by and they say, “Sir, can I ask you a question?” And they want you to come over, have a test cleaning done on your nails, and then they marvel at how shiny it is. Yes, I know what happens, because my wife and her friend stopped there the last time they were at the mall. Only in my case, they normally jump out in front of me and try to grab my hand, in an effort to make me stop. On a side-note, my favorite local DJ once told a similar story about how he was assaulted in a similar fashion when walking by one of these booths and the guy grabbed his hand. Anyway, I purposefully walk as far away (as close to the wall) as I can to avoid these booths, but they still yell to me and ask if they can ask me a question. I want to be clear that it isn’t them doing a good job selling; it’s them trying to push a lousy product while badgering the mall patrons.
OK, in 100% complete seriousness, who would shop in a t-shirt airbrushing store in the mall anyway? As Forrest Gump said, “That’s all I’m going to say about that.”
As far as the booths where you can win a free car or a new bathtub, sure I stop, but to fill out the forms in my buddy’s name. But again – this is wasted space for non-skilled solicitors who will call you at home and badger you over and over, even when you ask them to stop.
So to new open-style shopping centers out there, you’ll always get my business. I don’t like to shop, but even if I did, I certainly don’t like to be hassled while I’m there…