The Unanswered Question
February 16, 2009 by admncc
Welcome to The Constant Complainer.
I’ve always considered myself to be one of the “good guys.” I’m a caring family man, I often put others’ needs before my own, I don’t smoke, very rarely drink, work hard to provide for my family and pay the bills, etc. And I’m not saying that if you do or don’t do any of that stuff, that you’re not a good person. I’m just saying that those are some of my characteristics and I was using them to transition into my post.
Anyway, the groups of people I hang out with have the same morals as me. And I’m not necessarily talking about if they smoke or drink, but rather the other stuff – they’re good to their families, they work hard, you can count on them, etc. With my friends, I’ve always felt sheltered from a lot of the BS in the world. I haven’t had to deal with many deaths. There haven’t been too many other tragedies. No one has any serious illnesses. I don’t know too many couples who have gotten divorced. Everyone pays their bills as best they can. Everyone supports each other. Like I said – almost everyone I hang out with is like me.
Of course you’re all going to say – wake up stupid, you hang out with people who are like you and who you share interests with. Well, or course, I realize that. But the question becomes – are we just normal and unusually lucky that none of us have had to deal with anything major. Are we shielded from this ugly world? Maybe so…
Here’s an example. I was online and an unsettling article link popped up for eHarmony. It said, “Can you Predict if they’ll Cheat?” I’ve always felt awkward about infidelity-based articles. I guess I cannot imagine it myself, so I get angry thinking about it hurting other people.
I’m just so sick and tired of seeing innuendos on the Internet all the time about cheating spouses. Almost every day when I go to MSN.com, there are lead articles discussing everything from signs your spouse is cheating to questionnaires you can take (on the same topic) to stories about spousal infidelity on work trips. It’s everywhere. Even in my own neighborhood! A new business just opened up near my office. And they have a huge sign out in front of their building which says, “Do You Suspect Your Spouse of Cheating?” They are a private investigation firm, but I found their choice of a slogan to be pretty lame. Oh, there’s also last week’s episode of Oprah that was on our TiVo. It was about couples who survived infidelity.
Like I said, my experience in knowing anyone who has had to deal with this has been limited. But what I can tell you is this: The few we know who had to deal with emotional or physical affairs have said that it devastated their marriage and took counseling to repair it, if it was even repairable.
But I would imagine that all these outlets keep doing stories on infidelity because it interests people. Heck, I know it does. The “Are You Married or What?” post I wrote on here a while back, to this date, is the highest viewed post we’ve ever had on The Constant Complainer.
So we’ve established that eHarmony addressed it, MSN loves to address it, books are written about it and Oprah even had a show about it. Not to mention how many other television shows have story lines of infidelity. Plus, according to the research cited in the eHarmony article, 40% of all marriages have some form of cheating occur. So, to quote one of my favorite movies of all time, Con Air, “I ask what is going on. And I answer.” The general decline of society… Apparently we are all screwed (no pun intended).
Like I said, I’m grateful to not have to deal with anything like this and to not have to watch anyone I know suffer through something like this. But if you wonder why cheating is on the rise and why divorces are up, all you have to do is read the advice columns in the newspaper, look at the articles online or watch any TV show. I know it’s a broad complaint, but I just think it’s a sad day when infidelity is so rampant that companies are opening businesses and using that as their tagline. Heck, before you go, maybe you should check out your own spouse or significant other on this “Tell Tale Signs of a Cheating Spouse” checklist. All I can say is – wow. Someone put some serious time into this list… LOL.